• Dave Earley

Celebrate Your Differences

Differences are something to be celebrated not a point of contention!



"W hat on earth is going on? I think I’m on fire!”


It was three o’clock in the morning on a cold winter night, and I was physically burning up. Sweat soaked my side of the sheets. I like to sleep a little cool, and I was anything but cool. Cathy heard me stirring and rolled over.

“I’m freezing!” she said. “This electric blanket just does not seem to be working. Even though I keep turning it up, I keep getting colder.”


“The controls must be broken,” I added knowingly. “I keep turning it down and am only getting hotter.”


It was a brand-new electric blanket. We had gotten it as a wedding gift for our first winter together, and we were excited because it had dual controls. Cathy could be as warm as she wanted, and I could be as cool as I wanted.

Of course, the blanket and the controls worked just fine. We simply had the blanket and the controls backwards. Cathy had the controls for my half of the bed and I had the controls for hers. When she turned it up, it made my side warmer. When I turned it down, it made her side colder.


I am embarrassed to admit that we slept in misery for several nights before we figured it out. But once we got the controls right, the blanket worked just great. Cathy could turn it up and be warm. I could turn it down and be cool. The dual controls facilitated our differences effectively.


God Planned It This Way

When God created marriage, He intentionally designed it to be the joining of two distinct genders. Man needed a corresponding complement. He did not need someone exactly like him (like another man), but someone like him in many ways, yet different in several ways as well. He needed a suitable companion. So, God created woman from man.


The immediate joy and challenge of marriage is for two separate individuals to learn to complement each other and unite together in order to become one flesh. From the account in Genesis, several applicable truths are evident:


1. Men and women are different.

2. The differences exist in order to make the whole stronger than the sum of its parts.

3. The differences are what make the opposite sex so attractive— and so frustrating.

4. The challenge of uniting two very different people is what drives us to God to see Him do the mysterious and glorious work of making us one.

5. Marriages are enhanced as we understand, appreciate, and use our differences to complement one another and draw close, not criticize each other and draw away.


So… Celebrate your differences!


From the book Biblical Marriage. Order Here.

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